Don't Fart in Harrods

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PVDMR
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Don't Fart in Harrods

Post by PVDMR » October 23rd, 2016, 8:59 pm

A lady walks into Harrods. She looks around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely, she unexpectedly 'TRUMPS'.

Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone noticed her little woops and prays that a sales person was not anywhere near.

As she turns around, her worst nightmare materialises in the form of
a salesman standing right behind her - Good looking as well

Cool as a cucumber, he displays all of the qualities one would expect
of a professional in a store like Harrods.

He politely greets the lady with, 'Good day, Madam. How may we help
you today?

Blushing and uncomfortable, but still hoping that the salesman
somehow missed her little 'incident', she asks, 'what is the price of
this lovely bracelet?'

He answers, "Madam - if you farted just looking at it - you're going
to sh!t yourself when I tell you the price!"

buster121
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Re: Don't Fart in Harrods

Post by buster121 » October 23rd, 2016, 9:04 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:

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PVDMR
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Re: Don't Fart in Harrods

Post by PVDMR » October 23rd, 2016, 10:03 pm

The Engineer

An engineer died and reported to the pearly gates. An newly annointed angel, filling in for St. Peter, checked his dossier and grimly said, "Ah, you're an engineer; you're in the wrong place." So the engineer was cast down to the gates of hell and was let in. Pretty soon, the engineer became gravely dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and began designing and building improvements. After a while, the underworld had air conditioning, flush toilets, and escalators, and the engineer was becoming a pretty popular guy among the demons. One day, God called Satan up on the telephone and asked with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?" Satan laughed and replied, "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God's face clouded over and he exploded, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake; he should never have gotten down there; send him up here." Satan shook his head, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him." God was as mad as he had ever been, "This is not the way things are supposed to work and you know it. Send him back up here or I'll sue." Satan laughed uproariously, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a good Lawyer!!

TBone96
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Re: Don't Fart in Harrods

Post by TBone96 » October 23rd, 2016, 11:16 pm

Spot on mate

Andy123
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Re: Don't Fart in Harrods

Post by Andy123 » October 24th, 2016, 10:28 am

very good

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devo56
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Re: Don't Fart in Harrods

Post by devo56 » October 24th, 2016, 10:38 am

A couple of good ones to get the day started.

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